My Taper/Experience.

Hello everyone. I found this forum about 2 weeks ago, just about the time I was ready to jump off after tapering. I never made it around to posting before that but thought I would share my experience anyways. Quick background: Opiate abuser via pills for a few years. Started as medicine for broken ribs and turned into addiction shortly there after. I eventually got sick and tired of scoring pills only to keep withdrawals at bay. I found a suboxone doctor and he put me on 16 mgs straight away. This was waaaay too much and I cut myself down to 8mg a day and stayed that way for almost 16 months. At about the 1 year mark, I realized that I was now dependent on Suboxone. I had no cravings at all, but felt like crap if I was late taking it, etc. It -- in some ways -- felt much like my opiate addiction. I knew then that I had to get off. My doctor(s) were negligent in my opinion in terms of over medicating and then being fairly uninterested in my desire to get off of Suboxone. I'm now on day 15 of NO Suboxone and am starting to feel back to my old self of years ago. The first few days were the worst --> chills, sweats, skull-splitting headache, stomach issues and obviously a bit of anxiety over how bad things were going to be based on the large volume of horror stories I read on the web. Like some, I chose to taper off. Here's what I did (I am in NO WAY endorsing this as a proven method): 8mg for 16 months --> 4mg for 2.5 weeks --> 2mg for 1 week --> 1 mg for 3 days --> Jump off. I started to feel slight wd's on my 3rd day at 1 mg. A Suboxone nurse told me she thought that taking any more Suboxone or trying to stabilize at this point would just further delay wds and that there was no guarantee that they would be any less intense if I stayed at 1 mg for any longer. So, I let go that night. As I said, the first 3-5 days were the worst for me and I actually took a day off of work. By day 7, I was starting to feel much better. There are some lingering effects, such as a sleeplessness which is now starting to improve and just some general tiredness, which I found is actually made better by exercise and eating well. To be honest, I was MORE THAN READY to get off Suboxone. What started as something positive turned into nothing more than a cruch. Once I figured this out, my mind was made up with no doubts -- I wanted off. While I do believe that Suboxone is a good thing for many, I think there is an apparent danger in using it as a maintenance drug/medicine. For me in turned into trading one addition for another that felt eerily similar. Clearly I'm not saying everyone or anyone should stop what their doing if the medicine is helpful. But, I think the mental component of addiction is far stronger than the physical. Don't rely on Suboxone to do all the work. Take some ownership of the situation and use Suboxone as a platform or a place to start the healing. If you've been taking Suboxone for awhile, I ask you to think about why and what role it plays in your life. One last time -- I'm not anti-Suboxone, it did serve a purpose for me and I respect that. More than anything, I have respect for anyone and everyone who has the courage to struggle through and fight for a clean life and ultimately a better one. Your ultimate salvation is NOT going to come from an orange pill or a strip under the tongue, it's gotta come from within. Good luck to all.

Hi Neveragain and welcome to the forum. Thank you for posting about your taper and what led you to stopping Suboxone.
We have in the past had member asks for people to share their experience with stopping so I am sure it will help some if not many.
Are you currently involved in any kind of after care now that you have stopped? If I offend you by that question, I don't mean to. Some people need it and some people don't believe it is necessary. It depends on the person.
I'd like to hear more from you if you don't mind. Congratulations on your success!
Dee

Thanks for the reply. I hope that something from experience has the potential to help someone else, even in a small way. After re-reading my post, I want to clarify something, I was in no way suggesting that people rush off Suboxone -- that could be a very dangerous and costly mistake. What I was trying to get across is that it's always a good idea to check your self, so to speak, assess your situation, goals, etc. I found that Suboxone did such a good job of taking away the "hard parts" that I had just accepted it as a component of my life indefinitely. For me me, that wasn't going to work. I do want to say that some of the posts I read on here were critical to me being able to have the courage to take the final step. It's funny how words posted on the internet by strangers have the ability to comfort and strengthen. I am in no way offended by your question. In terms of after care, I do see a therapist (with a background in drug addiction ) once a month and I have a good support network set up for anything that unexpectedly arises. I totally agree that after care is an individual choice/need and I have seen the benefit in it for many. It's been good so far and I feel as though I have some real motivators in my life that will truly help with this. Thanks again to all the posters and to you, Dee. This site is truly something special and helpful -- it's like it's own form of therapy.