Welcome Marlene121471

Subject: Welcome Marlene121471 Fri 06 Nov 2009, 6:27 pm

Hello Marlene and welcome to The Light At The End of The Tunnel.
My name is Dee and I am one of the moderators of the forum. We also have two other moderators their names are Barbara and Beth. When you have a minute tell us a little bit about yourself and your recovery.
How are things going for you? Are you getting the help that you need? Is there anything that we can do for you?
Feel free to read the postings of the other members, post when you see some thing that catches your interest. How is the Suboxone working for you? Are your having any cravings or have you started Suboxone yet?
I have been in recovery for about seven and a half years now. The first four years I was an MMT patient and for the last three and a half years I have been a Suboxone Patient. I can honestly say that being able to take a medication to help me manage my addiction has been a lifesaver. So many times I tried to "Do it my way" And that didn't work. Oh I would be clean for a little while but it always seemed like something wold happen and it would only be a matter of time and I would use again. I remember one time I didn't take any opiates for about 2years. But then one day I needed someting for pain and I was off again only after a few days of pain medication. I learned that I simply cannot take opiates period. I wish I could tell you that recovery is an easy thing, but it's not. Recovery is something that you have to work at every single day of the rest of your life. But the rewards are great and many.
The other moderators of the forum will be along shortly to say hello and welcome you as well. Let us know how things are going with you.
Yours in Recovery,
Dee

Subject: Let's Welcome Marlene to the Forum! Fri 06 Nov 2009, 7:50 pm

Hello & Most Certainly Welcome to you Marlene! Welcome Marlene121471 Icon_cheers

If you have read any of my welcome posts, I always say the same thing at the beginning and that is that I am so glad that you have made it here and made it here alive! It makes me feel so good inside that yet another person is getting out of that life of opiate addiction. What a terribly miserable place to be! Welcome Marlene121471 Icon_twisted

Are you currently on Suboxone or thinking of beginning it? Or Methadone?
My name is Beth & I am one of the moderators here with Dee & Barbara Rue. They are both incredible women as you will find out as you get to know them. I am currently a Suboxone patient for 20 months now, but going right around the corner from 2 years of recovery. I went to detox in January 2008. I began my recovery before I found Suboxone, but never successfully, and by using Methadone that I had to buy from my "friends" to make it through until my Induction appointment. Then, I thought about going onto the Methadone program, but had 2 young babies, a one year old & six month old to drive there with me back & forth 45 mintutes each way to have to dose, not to mention that I had a 12 year old 7th grade daughter here that I was to get on the bus each morning- it seemed impossible & I did not pursue it. Rather, I heard of a doctor who would write out Methadone for pain & went to him & pleaded my case, come to find out that he has NEVER written a prescription for Methadone in his entire life. Yet, he could see my absolute desperation & sincerity & kept me comfortable on my medications legally until he pulled some strings to get me into a Suboxone Provider. He was ONE of the ONLY doctors along this entire ordeal that I actually felt like he cared. A family doctor. So my hubby went back to him & he said give me your name & number & I"ll be back to you with in 24 hours. He called ME back & gave me a number to call & got me an appointment with a Suboxone provider for 2 days later at 12:00. I better BE THERE! A friend of his, who happened to be a Suboxone provider, who happened to owe him a favor, decided that he would in fact stay through his lunch hour with 2 interns to see me to decide if he would or would not see me. He decided he would, but we got off to a rocky start. Today, I believe that he has respect for me as a human being. This is still all just happening, but I believe that doctors who know that you are sincere about truly desiring recovery will go above & beyond for you because they see that you really are changing your life around. And I have completely changed my entire life around! I am not even close to being close to the person that I was 2 years ago or even just last year! I am continuing to recover more every single day because I am learning how to live my life without opiates, which I never even believed was truly possible. It is & it is getting better the longer that I remain away from them! I feel some self pride again because I am no longer having to have to do the very most regreted times in our lives still over & over & yet, over again still today!
So, Marlene, I have really laid it all out for you, but I have to tell you that I was at the end of it all when I found Suboxone & it completely changed my life from one direction to the exact opposite, as I believed that there was no way out! I hope that you will let me know if you are already on Suboxone or Methadone & how are you feeling on that medication? Is it working for you? Any cravings or withdrawals? What brought you to become a member here Marlene? What is going on with you that is weighing down heavy on your shoulders? Barbara told me something when I first joined last November & it was "That a problem talked about is a problem half solved!" At the time, I thought, well that makes sense, but until you actually start talking, you don't understand the feeling that I mean. We have all been so alone in our addiction, then into our recovery, cause how do you drop that into a conversation, though I am getting better at it. I want to educate people that this can happen to you or your child or sister or best friend!!!
Marlene, I tend to ramble & go on & on when I feel passionately about something & I hope that you will you continue to read other posts here. We have a family type relationship, its really cool! We just want people who suffer from the disease of addiction to get it into remission by whatever means necessary, including if that means needing Suboxone or Methadone to keep their disease in control.
I look forward to getting to know you better Marlene & letting us know if yu have tried this wonder drug & how it has worked for you?!?!
Keep in touch.
Yours in Recovery,
Beth Welcome Marlene121471 Herz

Subject: Re: Welcome Marlene121471 Fri 06 Nov 2009, 10:15 pm

Hello welcome to our group I'm kimbo ..I found this place a little over 35 days ago looked around and said WOW these people know the road I have been down .Maybe there stories are different but they still have the same thing were addicted to opiates which makes a special group in my eyes we need another drug to help us stay off the opiates whether it be suboxone or methadone these two drugs let us carry on a normal life .. They give us a chance at recovery with out being dope sick ..My Dr. told me kicking the habit would be easy but living life would be the hard part and he was right ..Picking up the pieces of the damage I did will take time .. Here I have a place to find support as I go through that process and thank god for that ..So Im very glad you have joined I hope you find the same support I did . If you reach out its there for you .
Welcome to recovery
Kimbo

Subject: Re: Welcome Marlene121471 Fri 06 Nov 2009, 11:24 pm

Hi Marlene,

I'm Barbara and I have been addicted to something my entire adult life. I also am an alcoholic with seventeen years of sobriety from alcohol. I'm a little older than anyone here and did the hippie scene in Cocoanut Grove in Miami which led me to Cocaine, Heroin and Speed in my younger years. I ended up checking into a confrontational livein group home. When I got straight, I realized how much pain I was in and with age on me, I found out I needed something for pain. I didn't have any idea at the time I would be as strung out on codiene and went on to opiates. For ten years I fooled no one but myself about how bad I had gotten. I'd tell myself I can handle it and I'm okay. I'm just sick and if I can hold out till my next appointment, I'd be okay again. In the end I was running out of medicine in two weeks and spent hundreds of dollars buying off the street. I think what got my attention wasn't how haggard I had gotten and nodding off in traffic. It was my friend Tommy who died in my driveway. It was my friend Byron who went to California to die at his parents house. It was a close co-worker, Greg who died at home and another friend, Bill who hung himself in a jail hospital. In the middle of all this I lost my husband to liver failure due to drugs and alcohol. I knew in my heart and mind I would follow shortly if I didn't do something and quickly, I would be a corpse as well. A girlfriend who lost her husband too told me about Suboxone being prescribed a hundred miles south of here. The clinic where I lived was opening up here where I lived and my friend, Rhonda gave me the number. I haven't heard from her in about three years. I know in my heart she is gone too. If she was alive, she would have called me by now. I came to terms with myself and made the call that changed my life in a way I didn't know I would have such happiness and blessings that came my way. Each day even in the smallest of ways I feel the warmth of feeling good about me. I haven't done it all by myself, I've had the support of this forum where I have learned to trust and listen to what is revealed to me. I never want my Mother to try picking me up out of the kitchen floor and ending up calling 911 and got Baker Acted to the hospital. I'm telling you all this to tell you whatever you have done, wherever you have been, I've been there too. I extend myself to you in support and testify you will find a whole new life. Like Dee, Beth and Kimbo said, "It won't be easy," but it WILL be worth every bit of it. I hope you join us in our postings, but if you are more comfortable just reading, this is fine too. Just keep coming back. At one time this is all I could understand was to keep coming back and I did untill I could make it. I'm so glad I did and you will be too. I'll be glad for you cause I'll know another person has back tracked their mistakes and found a good road of recovery and the light at the end of the tunnel. Glad you made it here...please stay.

Yours in the struggle,
Barbara